Warning: Spoiler Alert
This week Mulaney returns with a completely new bit in the cold open. It wasn’t necessarily an incredible bit, but I appreciate incorporating new material. No one is going to mistake John Mulaney for a military man, so the bit was moderately funny.
John, Jane and Motif are in first class flying back from a wedding. The flight attendant makes an announcement that they have a Marine traveling with them. Which incites a discussion on feeling guilty about never enlisting. And right about the moment that John decides he’s going to give up his first class seat to the Marine, he looks over and Motif already has. It is vaguely reminiscent of a Louis CK bit called, “First Class” from his Live from the Beacon Theater special. Similar to, but not the same.
Somehow, Jane weaseled her way into the attention of this Marine. The Marine is played by Robert Baker who had a nice little stint on Justified. Oscar drops by with no real agenda in mind when he notices the Marine’s bag. Makes a reference the military in the 1960s being the first exposure to musical theater. As in USO shows. Then John thinks doing a USO show would be great. But not in a war zone. In a place like Florida.
On the set of You Guessed It, John asks if he can step out early to go sign up to do a USO show. This idea makes Lou very uncomfortable. It even launches him into some sort of dream sequence. John and Motif show up at the USO office. John had no idea that it was an audition situation and he bombed. Motif on the other hand, killed.
The Marine returns to the apartment with a three-legged dog. John offers to watch the dog instead of having it put in a kennel. Then asks if he would mind listening to John’s jokes to see how they might be received by a military man. What followed was a military alpha male playing drill sergeant to a man who is very much not military like.
Back on set, John again brings up the USO to Lou which is still not received well. John’s idea is that if Lou does the show, they will let him open for Lou. Apparently the USO is one of two things you never ask Lou about.
John asks Lou what happened back then. It was a flashback sequence to when he and an Improv troupe did a USO show in Hawaii. He bombed. Then shot his friend with a t-shirt cannon.
Motif lost the Marine’s dog when he left him in a park to ‘get laid’. As anyone would want to do for a soldier on leave. Eventually the dog makes his way to Oscar’s apartment. And then in the custody of Andre. Only it’s not Franklin (the three-legged dog). It’s just a German Sheppard that looks vaguely similar.
The roommates and Andre have a meeting to discuss what to do since they no longer have Franklin. Suggestions include, cut the leg off of the dog Andre found, cut the leg off of a stuffed animal dog, or trick the Marine into believing the hamster inside a diorama is his dog. When they settle on cut the leg off the dog Andre found, Chad the Marine walks in. He is naturally and immediately concerned for his dog. He is also dressed like a tourist. Which completely deflated any attraction Jane had for him. He also claims he can remove John from the USO show. Because, they can always find some old washed up USO comedian. Which gives John an idea.
John walks onto Lou’s sound stage and introduces an old friend. The guy Lou shot with the t-shirt gun. And he puts to rest any idea that Lou was at fault for any wrong doing. Then we find Lou and John on a plane in first class. John believes he is going to open for Lou somewhere in Florida. Just then the flight attendant over the loud-speaker says the trip to Kabul…. John instantly gets nervous. That’s about the time Lou tells him that he won’t be opening because Murphy (t-shirt gun guy) will opening. So John’s just going to Afghanistan to go to Afghanistan.